I’ll always be the one you left.
The one who knew you best.
The one who loved you to rest.
The one whose head fit just right on your chest.
The one whose life you were able to infest.
You’ll always be the one that hurt me the worst.
The one who let me thirst.
The one who was my first.
The one whose hurt I nursed.
The one who made me jump headfirst.
–S.
I was always too deep for a love so shallow.
I was always too deep for a person so hollow.
I was always too deep for you to swallow.
I’ll still be too deep for you tomorrow,
and you’ll always be the boy filled with nothing but sorrow.
–S.
Broken.
Poison.
Frozen.
Open.
Ocean.
Motion.
Chosen.
Woven.
Golden.
–S.
You’re a masterpiece.
You bring others peace.
No bitterness, you bring release.
You do everything with ease.
No appetizer, you’re a whole feast.
A new outlook, a new lease.
Ironed, not a single crease.
You make melancholy cease.
You’re a masterpiece.
–S.
I wait for you.
Like I think I’m supposed to.
You dropped me off one day,
and now it’s way past curfew.
Days pass, weeks, and eventually months too.
I sit like I’m in a church pew.
Who is coming for my rescue?
Am I still on your menu?
If you’ve crossed the ocean,
I can make it by canoe.
I wait for you.
Like I thought I was supposed to.
You were never coming back, were you?
–S.
One wrong move and it’s all tumbling down.
52 cards, face down, on the ground.
Your love has always been conditional.
I guess, that’s what we kept traditional.
It’s never been the most sturdy.
You’re always assessing me in a hurry.
I can never be anything new –
because what you thought of me,
was the only thing that could ever be true.
–S.
I run.
I turn every corner.
Mix up the number of lefts,
and the number of rights.
Down the hills,
and up the stairs in flights.
I run,
but it doesn’t matter how many turns,
or how fast – even when my sides burn,
because I always run right into myself.
I change up the paths, but they’re never any help.
–S.
Do you think you could love me just like this?
with acne scars that are hard not to notice.
Do you think you could love me just like this?
with internal monologues that don’t lean towards bliss.
Do you think you could love me just like this?
with eyes reflecting murky brown irises.
Do you think you could love me just like this?
with big wrists.
Do you think you could love me just like this?
with a tendency to vanish.
Do you think you could love me just like this?
Oh, how I wish.
–S.
The Messy Middle 🖤 