love – Page 3 – The Messy Middle 🖤

to You.

Impatiently,

but gracefully,

waiting for you.

Aimlessy,

but faithfully,

making my way to you.

–S.

Risky.

It’s too risky,

the little you want to give me,

could kill me.

It’s too risky,

all the things you hide,

might thrill me.

It’s too risky,

minimal attention,

might bring me,

to my knees.

–S.

Strength.

Look at what you did.

I was just a stupid kid.

I let you hold me.

I let you grope me.

I thought it was love,

but it was just lonely.

I let you hurt me.

I let you burn me.

I thought it was love,

but I was wrong.

All along, it was making me strong.

–S.

Deadly.

I met all the ones that weren’t ready.

The ones who didn’t want to go steady.

The ones that only wanted hot and heavy.

It’s been a deadly medley,

that left me empty.

I met the ones with ego and envy.

Of those, there were plenty.

I met petty,

an assembly of fake friendly.

It’s been a deadly medley,

that left me empty.

–S.

Loneliest.

I’m the loneliest.

I know we only just,

met.

I’ve already memorized your silhouette.

Feelings so strong, I could use a cigarette.

I can’t help but weave you into my net.

I’m the loneliest.

I know we only just,

met,

but the world owes me a debt.

–S.

Do stray dogs go to heaven?

It feels like I’ve never belonged to anybody but me.

Do stray dogs go to heaven?

I guess I’ll find out and see.

I’ve been searching and I’ve found no trace.

Is home a thing, person, or place?

If you could give me this one kindness, and just let me know.

I need some help knowing where to go.

–S.

Powdered Sugar.

All the honey in the world isn’t as sweet as you,

Stuck and sticky, too.

Dessert in human form,

powdered sugar dust-storm,

this can’t be the norm.

–S.

Learning.

I learned that it never turns out how you think it will.

I learned that there are still moments that can make time stand still.

I learned that death can happen on selfish hill.

I learned that with certain people you can never quite get your fill.

–S.

Self-Compassion.

The counselor tells me I should show myself grace.

The idea makes my heart race.

Could it really help erase,

thirty-three years of self-hate?

–S.

Too Deep.

I was always too deep for a love so shallow.

I was always too deep for a person so hollow.

I was always too deep for you to swallow.

I’ll still be too deep for you tomorrow,

and you’ll always be the boy filled with nothing but sorrow.

–S.